Wasting Time

I have been wanting to write a post of processing, not only the things that I have been learning in my School of Evangelism, but about a book I just finished reading. It's called "The Rest of God: Restoring Your Soul by Restoring Sabbath" and it's by Mark Buchanan. There were a lot of good thoughts in it and one of the things that impacted me most was the difference between "chronos" and "kairos", basically the time as a slaver and a taskmaster and the kind of time you actually notice and enjoy and experience life.

On the other side of that, God has been convicting me about wasting time. There's a lot of difference between savoring time and squandering it. And along with receiving time as a gift, there are always certain ways to use it BEST. He showed me the other day something that I found really interesting. He told me that if I do things on time or even ahead of time, it opens up the way and opportunity for Him to use me in other's lives in ways that I don't expect. I'll write more on this when I've processed it more.

As for prayer requests, I would love to have some extra energy and inspiration for writing.

It would also be great if I could stop drinking coffee because I think it is weakening my immune system immensely. So pray that process would go smoothly. Thanks! God Bless!

God is Faithful

Psalm 20. Go read it; it's amazing. :)

my version (to make it relevant to me as a woman)

May the Lord answer you when you are in distress; may the name of the God of Jacob protect you. May he send you help from the sanctuary and grant you support from Zion.

May he remember all your all your sacrifices and accept your burnt offerings.

May he give you the desire of your heart and make all your plans succeed.

We will shout for joy when you are victorious and will lift up our banners in the name of our God. May the Lord grant all your requests.

Now I know that the Lord saves his anointed; he answers her from his holy heaven with the saving power of his right hand. Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the Lord our God. They are brought to their knees and fall, but we rise up and stand firm.

O Lord, save your princess! Answer us when we call!

I would love it if you guys would pray this over me. :)

Have a lovely Wednesday night.

Beauty and the Mess

The title of this post is also the name of one of my favorite Nickel Creek songs. It's just the way life is; the good with the bad, the bizarre with the normal, the beauty with the mess. That's one of the things that God's been teaching me, to take everything together, in stride, in peace. That doesn't mean that I let whatever I want into my life, but when stuff doesn't go the way I expect it to, He wants me to keep breathing, to let Him work through the problems or strangeness.

What an incredible God we have. He designed things to be perfect, and even though we mess a lot up, He's able to bring such unity and redemption and beauty to life.

I just want to learn how to keep abiding. If I could tattoo my soul, it would be the word ABIDE in large bold letters and probably in another language so it looks cool.

And these days have been chilly, but beautiful. :)

There's a TIme for Everything

My mind is so full that it's hard to even pull out solitary words. It's a mush of thoughts and ideas and concepts and new understandings. However, because I am a verbal processor, I will try to make sense of it all.

One of the things God has been showing me in different ways is the beauty and importance of balance in my life. He's been telling me that there's a time for everything I need to do in a day, and he doesn't put things in order to take the fun out of life, but to make it more meaningful. I'm still learning this in a sort of trial-and-error way.

Another thought I've been pondering is where my treasure really is, where my heart goes to be filled, what I value most. I want the answer to be "God" every time, but it isn't. There are all sorts of things that I place a high value on, activities and passions that vie for my attention. Writing, singing, socializing, and it goes on. I want to learn what it really means to love God, not just to be loved by Him.

So that's all for today, because I am fairly exhausted. Oh, and please pray against headaches. I'm so sick of them. Goodnight.

Beautiful Monday

I don't know if I've ever written about this, but I generally love Mondays, and this was a Beautiful Monday for various reasons. First of all, it was significantly warmer than it was this past week and weekend, and I therefore enjoyed being outside much more. Also after the afternoon class, I got to have a lovely, long, and much-needed nap. I ended up cozily in my sleeping bag until dinner :)

Second, there was the first small group meeting, and it was really good to discuss and hear from each other what we're processing. As some of you know, I am always thinking and my mind never stops--so it was really wonderful to get some of that out :)

Thirdly, God was just...around. And telling me stuff.

Tomorrow can be amazing too.

First Friday

I can't believe it's already Friday of the first week of SOE. I already know it's going to go so fast. I love coming back to see friends but this program is so much more than that. It's deeper, somehow going to be vital to the rest of my life. It's definitely more than a feeling, but I can't put my finger on it. But even in the last week, God has been so close and personal to me. I can honestly say that I have invited Him more fully into my life, to be present and active in what I choose and who I talk to, etc.

Oh, and it was 19 degrees F last time I checked.

crazy, huh?

Halfway through the first week

Today was definitely pretty full. I can understand why they said that SOE would be busier. That's why I love having evenings mostly free after I come back from cafeteria cleanup.

Once I get used to being challenged intellectually every day--which I figure will take about a month--I think I'll start to really enjoy it.

Please pray for wisdom, strength, peace, and the ability to think clearly about what I believe and how to love God and other people.

I know this one's short, but I'm still figuring out how to get all the thoughts in my head out into articulate words. So bear with me, and please do pray.

In Texas Again!

I got to Texas yesterday at about 1:10 and then got a ride to the base. The first thing I noticed when I stepped out of the airport was that it was VERY cold. Apparently we're going to hit 17 degrees sometime this week at night, which is the coldest it's gotten in 14 years in East Texas!
That's pretty crazy, huh?
Okay so there were definitely some more significant things than the weather, but really, when you live in Arizona (the warm southerny part) your body is kind of in shock when it's that cold.
Anyways, the first day of Lecture Phase was AMAZING, incredible, and all that jazz. But I can't give you all those adjectives and then walk away. So...let me give you a brief rundown.
I skipped breakfast for need of sleep, and then went to base prayer.
Then we had a morning classtime as an SOE (School of Evangelism) which was really more of an overview of what Kim's priorities were and talking about our class verse, and then in the afternoon we had our first speaker, and he definitely challenged me in an awesome way. I'll write more about this when I understand more of what he's talking about. But the basic topic is a narrow road vs. a wide one, which is interesting because this is really similar to what one of our guys talked about in Brazil. But yeah, and then after that God called me away for a few hours to just be with him, listen, and write down what he said. And that was an incredible time.
God is definitely after all of my heart this year. 2010 is going to be, in a word, fabulous.

signing off for now. hope all of you are doing well. feel free to comment or e-mail me :)

It's 2010!!

So I was thinking about resolutions last night, and I decided I wanted to make ones that were practical and that I could actually fulfill, so here's my list:

1. Pack lighter.
2. Spend less time online and more face time
3. Fall back in love with God.
4. Drink more water
5. Write A LOT.
6. Be PASSIONATE about learning new things and life in general
7. LOVE MORE.

So that's my two cents for the new year, and I'm always thinking about something, so I'll post something more soon.
God bless you all!